Book Of Rules

The soap-opera-saga of the Ritchie's divorce gets worse or better depending on one's personal point of view - the world as innocent bystanders watches in the bath-tub of underhand mud-slinging when what should remain totally private is publicised by the publicity-mad with no forethought whatsoever on precisely who'll get hurt in the short and longer term.

Its not the run up to Christmas... oh no... 'tis the season of the bully.

Because, according to latest on-line reports, the fading singer with the fake-blonde hair has issued a ten point manifesto to be strictly adhered to by her about-to-be ex-husband in respect of their children. For example (if this is to be believed), when out and about in open spaces, the children are to have their hands regularly disinfected... they may only eat macrobiotically... they may not watch television (clearly that doesn't apply to open spaces... or does it?)... so on and so forth.

Two questions arise - is any of this normal... and what is wrong with kids being... kids? And, as an adjunct, a third (observation)... who precisely believes that being a complete control-freak is, in any shape or form, justifiable?

The woman in question was - not that long ago - recording a (new I assume) record in Basing Street - only, its not called Basing Street nowadays... anyhow... staff there were instructed (so my source reliably informs me) that when the woman was in situ that, should they come across her in (say) a corridor or... passing through a door... or anywhere in fact... she had issued an edict: there was to be no eye-contact.

Excuse me...?!

Who is it that lives in the real world... and who lives in a world where one's every move is protected by bullies in shades with bulging muscles?

This, is it not, is the Theatre of the Absurd.

But... its not just contained to so-called 'pop stars'... by no means... For example, when was the last time you actually spoke to your bank-manager? They probably exist but, generally speaking, telephone any bank and its absolutely impossible to speak to anyone in authority - one deals with machines.

And... should one be lucky enough to get to talk to someone in-situ, when one has a delicate problem to discuss - such is the fashion for open plan offices that one's disastrous or otherwise banking history can be related and discussed to the minutest detail in the full hearing of others queuing to pay their water rates.

Oh joy.

What if - for example - one would like to discuss a business proposal with (lets say) a senior person within (say) an Equity firm. Is this possible - of course not.

You have to submit written proposal after written proposal via the internet - whereupon, once you've hit the play button, all your hard-work simply disappears into a vacuum. Does anyone read it... one has no idea. Does it get to the person that one really wants it to? Who knows? Most probably not. And, more or less every internet site of that ilk one peruses has so many caveats and clauses - the small print - that, more often than not, its more dangerous to submit anything in that manner. Yet, equally often, there is no alternative. One that I looked at recently while involved in a spot of research, even had the temerity to explain to its luckless / hapless readers that anything submitted would fall under the ownership of the company to whom one submitted said submission.

Hey - thats a great way of doing business... I think not.

Once were the days that one could talk business to a business person, to a decision maker who wasn't hidden from view behind a phalanx of secretaries and personal assistants.

The days when one contacted person X and they'd respond. Not that long ago either. Old fashioned courtesies seem to have going out the window with the advent of the Blackberry / i-Phone / everything-by-e-mail or else generation.

The generation who are constantly looking over their shoulder, over your or my shoulder, wondering if there's something better going on than whats present and current. This is the generation who march into business meetings and slap their Blackberry's on the table and... disrupt said meetings every few minutes because they have an incoming e-mail... why?

Because, somewhat ludicrously, they seem to think that it could be more important than whats current, whats happening in front of their faces.

Its the entire grass is greener on the otherside mentality.

It may look attractive but, generally speaking, its not - and... much like Mrs Ritchie's fake-world - its exactly that... unreal.